‘The Hobbit’ shocks fans: Warner Bros. is producing a completely new CGI version with a star-studded cast including Will Smith, Jason Statham, Jonah Hill, and Emilia Clarke! Directed by Ryan O’Loughlin, the Burger King tie-in has left fans stunned. But the details of how they’re reimaginating Middle-earth are what truly have the online community in awe.
Los Angeles, 18 November 2025 – Warner Bros. dropped the mother of all bombshells this morning. A brand-new, fully CGI-animated remake of The Hobbit is officially green-lit for 2028.
The studio calls it “The Hobbit: Crown Collection Cut.” It will be three films again, but this time every frame is computer-generated, shot in 8K, and styled like a hyper-realistic video game.
Will Smith will voice and motion-capture Bilbo Baggins – described as “a street-smart burglar from West Philadelphia who got lost in Middle-earth.” His first line in the teaser: “Yo, Gandalf, what’s good?”
Jason Statham is Thorin Oakenshield. The dwarf king now has a shaved head, neck tattoos, and speaks with a thick Cockney accent. His war cry is literally “I’m having you, dragon!”
Jonah Hill plays a completely reimagined Balin – a sarcastic, fast-food-obsessed dwarf who keeps trying to open a burger joint in every new kingdom they visit.
Emilia Clarke voices a fiery, platinum-haired Tauriel who commands the Mirkwood elves with dragon-scale armor and dual energy blades. Yes, energy blades.
Ryan O’Loughlin, the 29-year-old director behind three Burger King “Whopper Quest” commercials, was personally chosen by David Zaslav. He calls it “Peter Jackson meets Fast & Furious meets Fortnite.”
The biggest jaw-dropper is the official tie-in: every ticket comes with a code for a free Impossible Whopper and a limited-edition “Smaug Sauce” packet. The dragon himself is now sponsored.
Smaug will be voiced by Idris Elba and redesigned as a sleek, chrome-plated cyber-dragon with neon wings. His treasure hoard includes vintage muscle cars and a mountain of gold-wrapped Whoppers.
Gandalf is played by Samuel L. Jackson. His staff shoots lightning and he drops the F-bomb every time someone says “fool of a Took.” The MPA reportedly created a special “PG-13+” rating just for him.
The thirteen dwarves now ride custom low-rider motorcycles instead of ponies. Bombur’s bike has a built-in grill. Yes, he cooks while riding.
Legolas, played by Timothée Chalamet, surfs on his shield down the barrels and says “yeet” every time he lands a triple kill. Orlando Bloom sent a single crying emoji on Instagram.
The Battle of the Five Armies has been turned into a 45-minute esports-style sequence with slow-motion explosions, dubstep, and a surprise cameo from Post Malone as Bard the Bowman.
Warner Bros. claims the budget is $1.2 billion across three films, making it the most expensive animated project ever. Most of it is reportedly going to Smith and Statham’s stunt teams.
The first teaser dropped at 3 a.m. Pacific. Within six hours #HobbitRemake was trending worldwide, split between “this is a war crime” and “I would die for Whopper Thorin.”
Peter Jackson issued a one-sentence statement: “I have seen the future of cinema and it smells like onions.” He then went silent.
Tolkien Estate lawyers are reportedly “reviewing options,” but sources say Warner secured the rights through a loophole involving the 1969 animated film.
The trilogy will release in December 2028, 2029, and 2030 – each film exactly 2 hours 45 minutes long, including 18 minutes of Burger King ads.
Ryan O’Loughlin ended the press conference with: “We’re not remaking The Hobbit. We’re dropping the greatest fantasy-action-burger crossover event in history. Flame-grilled orcs, baby.”
And somewhere in New Zealand, a single tear rolled down Sir Ian McKellen’s cheek as he whispered, “You shall not pass… the drive-thru.”
